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total amateur who loves to make awful garbage. still learning.

currently working on Cyberspace Is Dead, a zine for the digital disillusioned

Cart #awfulpong-2 | 2018-12-19 | Code ▽ | Embed ▽ | License: CC4-BY-NC-SA
5

FACE OFF against the invincible "BADDLE" in the ULTIMATE TEST of POINTLESS MASOCHISM!

hello pico people! i'm NULL VALUE, an internet ghost, imminent zinemaster and purveyor of total garbage.

this is a really bad game, because for some reason i get a kick out of making things that are bad. you can't win. it's an exercise in futility. i really can't recommend it to anyone.

so why the hell am i uploading it here? because it's the first actual game i've ever made. before yesterday, i'd never coded before, because programming was always too terrifying for me to even consider. but the pico-8 really called out to me, it's so cute and compact and it's a really nice and comfortable workspace and i love the cartridges and all the games and everything. so i pushed myself to try to learn, and i made this stupid pong game all by myself.

i can't even express in words the pure joy i, a disabled college dropout who failed algebra 3 times, experienced when i thought up a way to make the ball bounce off the paddle at an angle and it worked on the first try. honestly, it's magical. so i'm putting my unbelievably stupid pride and joy up here, just to cement the accomplishment. i think i can really do something with this! i've always wanted something to be proud of, so it's huge for me.

i hope i can keep pushing myself to learn more, and make more (amusingly) stupid and terrible games in the future. i'm really proud to be here among everybody.

just for reading all this crap, here's some secrets:

press Z on the title screen to launch 2 player mode

hold Z during the game to make it into an even more pointless nihilistic purgatory, and then lose points anyway

press X during the game to reset the ball and lose a point. is there any use to that? it's a mystery...

UPDATE: right after posting i think i figured out a hacky way to stop the ball getting stuck in the ceiling/floor, which was the game's most prevalent bug. yippee

P#60104 2018-12-19 14:30 ( Edited 2018-12-20 00:55)

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